Why Are Her Friends' Husbands Hitting On Her?

This Georgetowner advice column question came in all caps from a happily married woman who has been propositioned multiple times by her friends' husbands. Great question - what is happening? I went back to Esther Perel and her research on the reasons happily married people seek affairs, and her conclusions aren't always what you might think. Check our her TED Talk here and read my full column here.


Is a 'Friendless Husband' Something to Fear?

A recent Georgetowner advice column let me spend some time thinking about what happens when a more extroverted woman marries an introverted man, and then grieves what she perceives as his lack of friendships. I was able to put into words the warning that unless her husband directly asked her for help, she needed to consider why the circumstances were so hard for her. Read my full column here.


Is He Forgetful or Just Not Listening?

I hear this complaint in my office quite often - my spouse doesn't listen to me. I recently received a question for my Georgetowner advice column that gave me the chance to talk it through. The bottom line is that we don't always hear our partner. There are myriad reasons for this, but at the end of the day, it has an impact on the other person. When trying to communicate that impact, we must be attuned to how that message is coming across. If we are hurt and then convey that through attacking anger, the response is going to be reactive and defensive. But if we take the time to process how this experience makes us really feel - on the inside - and then deliver that message to our partner, s/he may respond differently.

Read the question and answer here.



It's Marital Flu-Shot Time

Now that we're all in the throes of Back to School time, I am reminded of a post I wrote a few years ago for the DC Urban Moms and Dads website - a short course on how to protect your relationship during this very busy season. Check it out here.


Summertime Advice

It's been a slow, lazy, wonderful summer, but I have fallen behind in my posting, so here's a roundup of my Murphy's Love column advice:

Connecting Through Complaint? Why does she find their gossip so irritating?

If Dad is Hyper-Critical, Mom needs to step up

Ex-Boyfriend Gets Benefits? What to do when the breakup doesn't take

Time to Change His Life - No more wasting time

As always, I welcome (and need!) your questions, so please send them in!